Random Winter Thoughts

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.

I suppose I shall start with The Good first.  The news that Morrissey has received a new recording contract is very welcome.  After 5 years in the hinterlands, he has signed a 2 record deal and will start recording in France next month.  I am so happy for him.  He is a true icon and a creative genius with words.  I so look forward to listening to a new album.  Also, Parody Morrissey has returned to Twitter.  I very much enjoy reading his eloquent, thoughtful and funny tweets.  I am honored to occasionally interact with him on Twitter.
I appreciate being able to write to someone of very evolved intelligence and creativity especially when I am as they say "not the sharpest tool in the shed".  I sincerely hope he doesn't feel I am bothering him because I never want to be a pest to anyone.  Parody Morrissey has a lovely group of followers who tweet with him on various topics.  Some are outsiders like myself, some are devout devotees of Morrissey, some love the interaction with an icon and all are very intelligent, gracious individuals.

Continuing with The Good, Ice Hockey has been a real pleasure this season.  I have been playing better this season than I have for a couple of years.  I'm a step quicker and I have more endurance.  I was thinking why is that?  I became a full vegetarian 2 years ago and noticed my (very limited) athletic prowess is improved.  So thanks once again to Morrissey, because of his principled stance on the defense of animals, I made a decision based on that and a lot of personal reflection.  It has worked out in so many ways for me.  I have never felt better physically and mentally I feel wonderful knowing I am not living my life on the killing of animals.

Unfortunately there is plenty of bad as always.  Number 1 being, I despise winter.  I hate cold weather and snow and long for the soothing warmth of summer.  Needless to say, summer is quite far away.  Even spring would be a welcome respite.  The cold wears on me and makes me old before my time. I see lines on my face I never knew I had. The only way to get through is the old adage, one day at a time.  The other brutal part of The Bad is getting up every day for work.  Getting up early is about the worst thing I must do daily. The alarm rings and my fuzzy head implores me "STAY IN BED" but my reasonable half always wins out and I stumble out of bed to get ready to become an insignificant piece of The Machine.

Now to The Ugly.  I visit a couple of times per week with my elderly neighbor lady.  She is in her early 80's and a very lovely, sweet person.  We tell each other stories and have quite a few laughs about our nutty neighbors.  I do look forward to our chats.  The sad thing I have noticed is little by little her mind is slipping and it genuinely make me feel somber and sorrowful.  Why does age have to do that to people?  I worked at the old age home near where I live last week.  Seeing all the beautiful, wonderful people there that have had age ravage them of everything they once had is very much depressing and distressing.  I weep for them in private, wishing they could be what they once were, yet knowing they will never be and have only death waiting on their doorstep.  I also know this is my future.  I will try not to go gentle into that good night but seeing those lovely folks and their struggles with age gives one a true sense of foreboding.  After much consideration, I have decided when I die, I want to be cremated and have my ashes thrown over the Ice Rink where I play hockey and the park where I play tennis and run, for these are the places in life where I have felt true joy, love and contentment.  I want no trace of me to exist past my death, so it will be not known that I ever walked on this earth. I know I wont go to heaven because God will not want me.  My hope is to be reincarnated and be an individual that will do something remarkable, like a cure for Cancer, a cure for Alzheimer's or a singer who writes songs to inspire a generation or a President who can stamp out racism and hate of gay people or a leader who can make the violent become peaceful.  Noble goals for the most un-noblest of souls.

The Runner

It was a beautiful fall day today.  So I wanted to write a small piece just to remember this fine day.  It was sunny and 65 degrees.  After work it was time to go for a run.  So into the car and down to the trail I went.  The conditions were absolutely perfect to run.  The run itself was exhilarating.  My mind just focused on the task at hand.  Gliding effortlessly, one foot in front of the other, perfect motion.  It seemed like I could go forever.  I never really got tired.  Then it was over after 4.5 miles.  I felt euphoric, elated and so satisfied in the moment.  Today was sublime and the reason why I love to run

My run made me think of the song "The Runner" by Manfred Mann.
And wouldn't you know, today just happened to be Manfred Mann's birthday.  This day I was "The Runner" and it was splendid.
 

The Empty Room

I saw in the paper today The Barenaked Ladies were appearing in concert this evening in Pittsburgh.  I didn't even know they were still around.  What caught my eye was the lead singer Steven Page was no longer with the group.  I have no real interest in their music at all but I thought it was interesting they were carrying on without him.  How many bands can really survive without the lead singer who was there when they became famous.  I actually watched part of a concert of theirs years ago and thought Steven Page looked rather silly on the stage but who am I to criticize a band playing in front of 10,000 fans.

So all of this made me think of another band that lost its lead singer (after they became semi famous) and tried to carry on.  That would be the one and only Wall of Voodoo.  After their semi underground hit  "Mexican Radio", lead singer Stan Ridgway left the band.  What the hell happened to him after that?  Well some of the boys in Wall of Voodoo decided to carry on.  They made several albums but were unable to recreate the success of the "Mexican Radio" era.

I actually like the above song "The Empty Room".  Which was on the "Happy Planet" album, after Ridgway left the band.  It kinda pertains to me in a sad and pathetic way.  I sit in empty rooms a great deal.  I have alot of time to contemplate things, so these are the kinds of musings that go on in my warped mind. 

Morrissey's Autobiography came out today but it is not available in the USA.  So until then I will have to ponder the predicamants of The Barenaked Ladies and Wall of Voodoo.

The World is Collapsing around our ears

 

I was watching a show about problems in the Black community for young black men and the portrayals of today's Rap artists glorifying the thug lifestyle.  The show centered on a group of underground rappers doing political and thought provoking stuff that doesn't promote a violent lifestyle.  They had in the background of one shot a Pic of KRS One, which made me think of this song......

 

I Know Its Over

Its hard to believe.  My favorite time of the year is over. It seems like it never really even began.  Summer goes by so quickly.  Each day is a new adventure and a potential for new possibilities.  Summer is life, warmth and growth.

It was a great season of tennis, running, enjoyment of warmth and being outside.  So my tennis season went
quite well.  There is nothing more satisfying to me than being on the tennis court on a beautiful summer evening.  No troubles, no worries, no stress.....just me and the ball...  focus and concentration... the beauty of sport... being with my friends.  All good things come to an end, so alas has this summer.

The fall isn't so bad.  What's bad is what comes after fall.  I absolutely despise winter.  It is my enemy.  Winter is cold, death and loneliness.  Soon the leaves will be gone from the trees.  The birds will migrate and the landscape will be barren.  The time goes by so slow, the 3 months of winter are an eternity.

Last week was my first Ice hockey game of the season.  It actually was pretty fun.  I would rather play tennis in a heartbeat though.  I like playing ice Hockey a lot.... I LOVE playing tennis.  Ice Hockey gets me through the winter.  I lean on playing Hockey to make the winter more bearable.  Thank God I have that or I would seriously go out of my mind.

Its quite pathetic,  each day I wake up in the winter, I count in my head the number of days till May begins.
My sad saga continues.  The parts of life I truly enjoy are few and far between.  These bits of life pass so quickly, I never seem to get to enjoy them enough and then they are so quickly gone.  It seems  I'm always left staring at the parts of life I find distasteful.  Will it ever change?

The Most Inept who ever Stepped

So yea, it was the July 4th Holiday and I'm off work and generally psyched cause its summer and hot weather.  So my Mom called and asked me over to my sisters for a cookout on the 4th.  I agreed to go because I haven't seen anyone from my family in like 3 months and thought it would be nice.  I don't eat meat so I really dislike the cooking of animal flesh on the grill but will overlook it this time.  I had talked to my Dad the prior week and he said he missed seeing me.  So I figured going to this was the right thing to do.

WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My family is so f-cking weird.  I get there and say hello and immediately told I'm playing in this stupid cornhole tournament.  I really have no interest in playing some ridiculous lawn game throwing bean bags.  Oh no, my family is serious about their cornhole.  Well I say I am not going to stay long so I am not going to play.  You would have thought the world ended.  The controversy it caused was almost as bad as the NSA spying scandal.  There's like all kind of people there but me having no interest in playing has ruined the party.  How inane is that?  They really are into this game.  They spend time dissecting shots and what happened days and even weeks later.
The champions are treated like they just won Wimbledon.  Thank God I left before that part of the evening. 

So I'm sitting there watching these people play this uninteresting, stupid game and thinking to myself WTF am I doing here.  I definitely do not fit in with this crowd.  Unfortunately they are my family, what am I to do.  My Dad who said he missed seeing me said all of 5 words to me while I was there.  Am I missing something here?   I guess I wasn't missed that much.
My Mom hardly spoke to me either.  This is so weird, they want me there but don't have the time to talk.  I think I was duped.

After 2 hours of this torture I had enough and it was time to leave this insane asylum.  I was so happy and relieved to get the hell out of there.
Never again I swear.  It reminds me of the line in Policy of Truth.  Never again is what you swore the time before.  Each time crap like this happens at one of these things I swear never more.  But I go back for my parents sake to make them happy.  I think this was the last straw for me.  I was so upset about all this I had trouble sleeping that night.  Is it worth it?  From now on I'm gonna be busy or have plans etc.  No Mas!  No Mas!

Did you hear about the midnight rambler

Our Moz was spotted on Friday May 3 in Los Angeles at the Staples Center to see The Rolling Stones concert.  From what I have read, it was a pretty good show.  Its amazing The Stones can still play well at their ages.  Its good to see Morrissey out and about.  I sincerely hope his health is good and he is feeling stronger. I would have loved to hear his thoughts on the show.  I'm not a particular fan of The Stones but they do have some iconic tunes that have stood the test of time.  What is truly astounding is that Keith Richards is still alive.  Maybe he really isn't human, he could actually be a zombie and will be around forever.
But I digress, its good to see Our Moz as always and I hope he enjoyed the concert.