Ode to a Fidus Achates

I preface this by saying I have never been friends with Scott Weiland, nor have I ever even met him. His music has been a friend/companion through my entire life.  So in that sense, he was to me a friend.  I have been deeply affected and saddened since I learned of his passing the other day.  He was the charismatic leader and creative force of The Stone Temple Pilots.  His music was always there, a part of my life.  I would turn on the radio, watch a video and it would be Interstate Love Song, Plush, Big Empty, Big Bang Baby, Trippin' On A Hole In A Paper Heart, Sour Girl and so many more.  They were not only great songs, they were a comfort to me, like a good friend.  Knowing those songs, hearing them, enjoying them, always gave me a good feeling.  Now the man who sang and wrote them is dead.  Of course the songs will always live on but the voice who sang and the man who wrote them is gone.  There is some solace that the songs will always be there but never again will they be brought to life, performed live for people to enjoy by the incredible force that was Scott Weiland.

There is no doubt Scott had problems over the years with substance abuse.  Many cases of in and out of rehab and relapses.  I had always rooted for him to beat the demons of drugs and alcohol.  I wanted him to make it not only because of his incredible talent, but also because of those who didn't make it.  We lost his peers Kurt Cobain and Layne Staley to the scourge of addiction.  Now 3 of the greats of that era have been taken way too early.  I remember reading an interview with Scott and I thought this was prophetic.  He said he always had trouble handling the fact the same people who beat the hell out of him when he was in High School, were the same people who were now dancing and loving his music in the mosh pit of his shows.  He had trouble reconciling his fame, as did Cobain and Staley.  I wish someone could have helped Scott to avoid this tragedy but sometimes it is a situation that can't be changed because he had to change.  I cannot begin to know or understand what happens to cause addiction.  I also will never know or understand the talent and creativity of a Scott Weiland.  How do the two (addiction/drugs and talent/creativity) relate and how do they intertwine?

*** I had to add this small addendum.  I read an interview with Scott, where he said was molested by an older guy when he was twelve.  He said this had severely bothered him his entire life and caused some of his substance abuse problems.  I unfortunately can relate to him, as the same thing happened to me at age 13.  I know the toll this can have on your soul.  He did a cover of The Smiths "Reel Around The Fountain" on his "Happy" Galoshes album.  Many interpret this song as having implications of an older man molesting a young boy.

           It's time the tale were told

                                                       of how you took a child

        and you made him old     

                            

                                                        Reel Around The Fountain
        

                                                                       Kurt Cobain

                                                                         Layne Staley

                                                                   Scott Weiland

                                                                Interstate Love Song

                                                                            Plush

                                                     Trippin On A Hole In A Paper Heart

                                                                          Vasoline

Scott Weiland will always be remembered for his exceptional talent, creativity, energy and spirit.  The music will live on, even though he is gone.  His spirit will always be there because great music never dies.  I love you Scott, always will, I'll never forget you.

                                                             A Song For Sleeping
                                 
                                                               Rest in peace Scott

Liberté, égalité, fraternité

I am sitting here off from work today because I have Bronchitis.  I had to go to the Doctor yesterday to get antibiotics.  I have been contemplating the horrid massacre in Paris of innocent folks out enjoying a Friday evening in one of the world's great cities.

There are so many questions to ask.  The problem is there are no good answers.  I grieve for all those who lost their lives and their families and loved ones.  I pray for the wounded that they may heal and become whole again.  The French people are our brothers and sisters.  No one deserves to die in the way these people were butchered on Friday.  And on the other hand, no one deserves to die like the innocent folks in Syria, Iraq, Afghanistan have died over the last years.

The usual suspects come out of the woodwork crying for more war, troops on the ground.  That worked really well when the US and Great Britain invaded Iraq.  Why would anyone listen to these idiots?  They have been consistently wrong on everything since the 9/11 attacks.  Why does anyone pay attention now?

How do you defeat an ideology?  How do you stop terrorist organizations from recruiting young men willing to kill anyone and blow themselves up?  How do you stop the hatred of the western world?  Bombing and killing indiscriminately will certainly not help any cause.  Poverty, desperation and no hope for a future will not help deter young men from joining a cause.  The more innocents that die in the middle east from our bombs is a recruiting poster for the jihadists.

I certainly don't have all the answers.  I do know bombing, drone strikes, boots on the ground and more war is not going to stop an ideology and cause.  This is not World War II or any kind of conventional war we have ever seen.  There must be a way we can work through this without mass killings of innocents and total destruction of peoples lives.  It is many ways our fault for intruding on the middle east with the horrific, unnecessary invasion of Iraq.  The worst foreign policy blunder in the history of The USA.  Many of the people there don't trust us.  Can you blame them?  How do you put the genie back in the bottle?  You can't, and there is the conundrum we find ourselves in.

God bless those murdered in France and God bless those murdered in the middle east.  I think of the words Liberty, Equality and Fraternity.  The proud and profound motto of France.  A true noble set of words to base a country, a people, a civilization on.  We need to apply it here and everywhere.  If we don't, the future looks quite bleak for a long time, maybe forever.

Great Songs of Christmas

                                                                           Jan Peerce

In my limited knowledge of music, I believe Jan Peerce has one of the best voices I have ever heard.

                                                                     Noel Nouvelet

The Way It Is

Monday's child is fair of face,
Tuesday's child is full of grace;
Wednesday's child is full of woe,
Thursday's child has far to go;
Friday's child is loving and giving,
Saturday's child works hard for its living;
But the child that is born on the Sabbath day
Is bonnie and blithe, and good and gay.

Today I had to do some work in downtown Pittsburgh.  I do not particularly like driving there because of traffic and the difficulty of finding a parking space.  Fortune was on my side today, as I found a space right next to where I had to work.  I pulled in the space and looked out my window and noticed a lady of about 65 to 70 standing there begging for change with a small styrofoam cup.  I was a little bit surprised at first and then a feeling of sadness and pity went through me.  I thought that could be my Mother or my Grandmother or someone I cared about.  She could be some one's Mom or Sister or Aunt and here she was all alone begging in Pittsburgh.  I got out of my vehicle, retrieved my work items and got what spare change I had in my pocket and dropped it in her cup.  She said "God bless you."  I nodded, smiled and went on to my job.  As I was working, my mind drifted back to the poor lady on the street.  I wondered why she was out there.  Didn't she have anyone to help her or care for her.  A big city is a horrible place for an older lady to be on her own.  I completed my work and thought what else could I do for her?  I only had a couple dollars in my wallet.  So I decided to drop them in her cup as I left.  She once again said "God bless you" and I smiled and replied "I hope you have a nice day."  That was it.  I got in my truck and pulled out in traffic, on to my next job.  I felt good that I had given the lady a few dollars but in reality that's not very much.  Here was a poor soul on the street and that's the best I can do?

After some contemplation, I am somewhat disappointed in myself that I couldn't do more to help the lady.  I am seriously angry that in the richest country in the world, we have poor souls like her on the street who have no other choice but to beg.  The greed of this country is on high display as the Republican party held a Presidential debate last night.  The sparkling ideal of those charlatans is how to take more money from the poor and middle class and give to the oh so suffering wealthy.  No compassion for those with less.  To them, those with less are leeches on society trying to take money from the rich.  The Church is no less a villain in this tragedy.  Beautiful temples of worship, bishops living like kings and fiefdoms of lavish lifestyles.  Yes, there is a pittance put towards the needy but if Jesus Christ came back and saw what religion has morphed into, he would be seriously nauseated.
In the movie "Wall Street", Gordon Gekko famously said "Greed is good."  So many people today live their lives based on this motto.  What a sad epitaph for our society.  I think I can put it better - SHAME IS THE NAME.

                                                                     "The Way It Is"

                                                                  "Greed is good."

                                                                "Shame Is The Name"

Forgive Someone

                                                               Kelly Gissendaner

The State of Georgia executed a female prisoner yesterday.  Kelly Gissendaner was convicted of hatching a plot to murder her then husband.  Her boyfriend actually committed the murder, pleaded guilty and was sentenced to life in prison.  She refused a plea deal at the time and was convicted and sentenced to death.

After seeing this on the news last night and reading about it today, I have an overwhelming sense of sadness.  Of course murder is wrong, but do we have the right to kill someone that has been convicted of murder?  Does that make us any better than the murderer?  When does the cycle end?

Apparently Kelly had become a model prisoner.  She earned a degree in theology.  She helped other inmates.  She repented and asked for forgiveness for her crime.  Did she genuinely feel remorse or was it just a ploy to live.  I have no way of judging that as I cannot read her mind.  I give her the benefit of the doubt and say yes she truly felt sorrow for what she did.  What did they accomplish by killing her?  Nothing.  If she would been allowed to live, she could have helped other inmates.  She may have made a difference in someones life that could have made the world a better place.  The neanderthals that are judges and executioners must feel satisfied with themselves for their vengeance.
But I seem to remember a little quote "Vengeance is mine saith the Lord".

The death penalty is an antiquated statute that should have been shelved many years ago.  It is a relic of a past time that a modern society should have no parts of.  I am not saying we should not punish criminals.  A convicted murderer should face the full force of the law.  That should be life in prison with no possible parole.  We should not be killing people who are convicted of crimes.  Can people in society have a little self reflection?  The holier than thou folks who have never done anything wrong or made a mistake.  Let he who has no sin cast the first stone.

I am incredibly sad for Kelly Gissendaner and her family.  My heart aches for her deceased husband and his family.  It is a horrible conundrum for all involved.  Again my question is:  What did we gain by killing this lady?  The stark answer is nothing.  Can we forgive someone?

                                                                   Forgive Someone

Such A Little Thing

Makes Such A Big Difference

“In their secrecy, Harri does not like Tracey’s knotted banana toes, and Tracey finds the manly central issue too slight to grip, and although such things ought not to count in the adult mind, somehow they do yet they don’t yet they do yet they don’t.”

                                         Such A Little Thing Makes Such A Big Difference

                                              It's Hard To Walk Tall When You're Small

This Is The End, Beautiful Friend

                                                                          The End

This is and has been a gloomy, disheartening week.  Two factors have contributed to my melancholy.
The end of summer and Morrissey announcing he is no longer going to tour in the UK because of a lack of a record deal.

The end of summer is always a distressing time.  The end of tennis season and the end of warm weather, both of which I love immensely.  What's next is the wicked witch of winter.  Which means nothing but cold and death.  Summer is truly my beautiful friend.  I eagerly welcome my my balmy companion every year and I mourn when my compatriot so hastily leaves me all alone and chilled.
The fact is, there is nothing I can do but accept the situation and move forward.  It doesn't mean I have to be happy about it.  I dread lacing up my skates for Ice Hockey.  A head full of dread.

                                                         The Summer's Out of Reach

My second source of anguish is the announcement Morrissey will no longer tour The UK.  He played 2 amazing shows at the Eventim Apollo and that was that.  He covered an Elvis Presley song called "You'll Be Gone", which Elvis actually wrote.  He also sang "Boxers", which hasn't been played live since 1995.  His tour will continue in Europe, then on to South America.  After those dates are over could that be it?  I certainly hope not!  He apparently has songs for several albums.  I want to hear those songs.  I don't begin to know what goes on in the music business.  Today's music industry is not the same as the past, it has changed forever with the digital age.  The bottom line in any business is to make money.  There has to be a place for Morrissey somewhere in music.  He does have another gig as a writer.  His "Autobiography" was a huge success.  His first novel "List Of The Lost" is coming out this week.  Could he retire from music and become a full time writer?  Possibly.  I just can't imagine Morrissey not on the stage, singing and performing his incredible music.  I believe Morrissey said the only place he feels truly alive is on stage.  This is so true, you can see it in his eyes, his mannerisms, how much he loves being on the stage.  I will continue to hope this is not the end.  I feel there is so much more left in the journey.  Only time will tell.

                                                                      You'll Be Gone

                                                                             Boxers

                                                                     Oboe Concerto

Are You Sure

Hank done it this way?

Its been a week now since Morrissey sang "Are You Sure Hank Done It This Way" at his final U.S. Concert stop in Visalia CA.  I have waited a week in an attempt to digest the meaning.  I can't really figure out why Morrissey chose to sing this song.  Waylon Jennings wrote it and sang it as a protest and a move to change from the regular old ways of Nashville,  I know Morrissey feels he is an outsider to the current music scene, so I can definitely see that side of it.  It's just crazy because this song is actually one of my favorite songs.  I do not like Country music at all.  But I have always liked and respected Waylon because of his past with Buddy Holly, Johnny Cash and his outsider status.  Regardless of why he sang it, I think it is a marvelous version of the song.  Morrissey did Waylon proud.

Here is Waylon's version as a comparison to Morrissey.  One thing that sticks out to me is how good Waylon's steel guitar player is.  Another is Waylon's finger picking at the end is super duper.  I absolutely love both versions of the song.

Another amazing thing happened at Morrissey's Visalia concert.  He played "Oboe Concerto".  Oboe is absolutely my favorite song on "World Peace Is None of Your Business".  Oboe is one of my all time Morrissey faves and one of my all time favorite songs.  He played Oboe and Hank back to back.  Unbelievable!  Also, this was the first time he ever played Oboe live.  Geez, 2 of my all time faves back to back.  When I saw the set list, I thought I had died and gone to heaven.  So, thanks Morrissey for giving a nobody from nowhere a small piece of happiness.

The Lost of The List

Morrissey's new novel "List of The Lost" has been published and is going to be released in September.  I am very excited and certainly anxiously awaiting to read his book.  Morrissey is a wordsmith beyond compare so it has to be very good.  Everyone is contemplating what the novel could be about.  I personally have no idea and will leave those thoughts to others.  I have turned the title around a little to "The Lost of The List" and had some minor little musings.

There are so many lists these days.  And it seems I am lost on many of these lists.  So I figure I am the lost of the following lists:

"I'll see you in heaven if you make the list yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah."

The List to get into Heaven:
1810. Todd Davis
1811. Geraldine Tolliver
1812. Mark Fry
1813. Tammy Reynolds
And so on and so on.......
There is a name that's missing from this list, henceforth the lost of the list, it is me, Harrison Zeldemar,

"Sit down, take a look at yourself.  Don't you want to be somebody."

The List of those who are "Somebody":
972. Kim Kardashian
973. Jared Fogle
974. Donald Trump
975. Silvio Berlusconi
"On and on, I just keep on trying"  I'm lost on this list also.  I suppose this makes me a nobody.

"He got the action, he got the motion, yeah the boy can play."

The list of great athletes:
424. Roberto Clemente
425. Mario Lemieux
426. Jerry West
427. Joe Montana

"Reach the stars, fly a fantasy, dream a dream and what you see will be, but not for me."  The never ending story.  I'm definitely lost on this list.

Yes, there are many more lists I am lost on and they are too numerous to list here.  Maybe I should make a list of the lists I am on, but no, that would be too depressing.  For now, I shall look forward to reading Morrissey's  "List of The Lost".  And yes, I do feel I am probably on the list of the lost as I aimlessly wander the timeless skies.

Rhythm of Life

I woke up in the middle of the night last night.  I couldn't fall back to sleep because I thought of the line in the Morrissey song "Oboe Concerto", "Round, round rhythm of life goes round".  What is the rhythm of life?  Does it really go round?  If it does go round, does it go clockwise, counterclockwise, both or neither?  These items went round and round in my head, as I do believe there is a rhythm to life. It can be a good, positive rhythm or a bad, negative rhythm.  I gradually drifted back to sleep but awoke troubled with the questions circulating through my consciousness.  I knew of only 1 soul who could answer my question.  It was the lovely Star Maiden, Astraea.  I posed the question to the lovely lady this morning and received a thoughtful, gracious reply which I deeply appreciate.

Harrison ‏@OdysseyNumber5  8h8 hours ago

@FadingGoldLeaf Hello lovely lady, I have a ?. Do you feel the rhythm of life goes clockwise, counterclockwise, both or neither?

Astraea ‏@FadingGoldLeaf  7h7 hours ago

@OdysseyNumber5 Hello my gentle little chicken. The rhythm of life is the record player. You decide what you want it to play for you.

Astraea ‏@FadingGoldLeaf  7h7 hours ago

@OdysseyNumber5 And how loud

The lovely Star Maiden's reply to my message has given me a lot of food for thought I must contemplate and try to apply it to my life, situations in my life and those I am close to.

And now for one of my favorite Morrissey songs: "Oboe Concerto".

Iris

Henry John Deutschendorf, Jr.

Stop

                                                          The scene outside today

I want the hands of time to stop right now.  It is July 31, the end of another month of summer.  It is a dazzling day filled with radiant sunshine.  I want to embrace the moment, treasure it, so I never forget it.  I want to hold on to this for as long as I can.  Tennis will be wonderful this evening.  I beg for time to go into slow motion but alas I know it won't.  Too soon it's over and done.  Time is an evil bastard.

                                                                          Stop

                                                                   Beautiful Day

                                                                   Sing Your Life

I'm an Anti Dentite

So today was my dreaded annual trip to the Dentist.  I don't know why I get worried about going to the Dentist.  I have only ever had one cavity.  I suppose one of the only gifts I was ever given is strong teeth.  I am always worried the Dentist will come in, after inspecting the X-Rays and say I have 5 cavities.  What I really hate most is the Hygienist who cleans my teeth.  I call her "The Marquis de Sade".  I don't call her that to her face of course.  I just think of it as she is torturing me with that damned metal pick of hers.  I really do think she enjoys inflicting pain on her patients because they didn't floss enough or didn't brush the correct way.  She politely smiles and says "Now that didnt hurt did it?"  In her evil mind she's thinking "Pain, Pain, Pain" for the Anti Dentite.  So now this evening my mouth feels like Napoleon's Army attacked it with bayonets drawn.  And after The Marquis de Sade was done torturing me with her metal pick, the Dentist finally came in.  He is a very genteel fellow, a total opposite of The Marquis.  He poked around in my mouth for about a minute and in a slightly disappointed tone he announced, "You don't have any cavities."

Now on a serious note.  A Dentist from Minnesota named Walter Palmer murdered a lion in Africa who was lovingly known to the locals as Cecil the Lion.  He apparently paid $50,000 and had 2 guides with him.  They used bait to lure Cecil outside the nature preserve where he lived.  He shot Cecil with a crossbow but that didn't kill him.  They tracked Cecil for 40 hours and finally found him and shot him to death with guns.  It makes me so angry I can't think of words to describe what a despicable act this was and what a loathsome person this individual is.  I wish he could be put into a cage with no weapons and several hungry lions and see what happens.  Or maybe he could be hunted by several men with high powered rifles with scopes and see how he likes it.  He is apparently wanted by the government of Zimbabwe for this shameful act and is now in hiding.  I sincerely hope he is found and deported there to face some kind of justice.  Unfortunately, this will not bring back Cecil the lion.  And lest we forget, every day millions upon millions of animals are murdered by humans, what a bunch of hypocrites we humans are.

Find My Nest of Salt

The Great Compromise of 2015

The widely anticipated Sumarongi College Board of Regents took place.  It was an emergency meeting called because Scholar Emeritus "Ye Olde Farte" was attempting to force the School of Fine Arts Fall Musical to be a production based on the songs of the singer Taco.  The Drama Department head Pantz A, DeLeon was vehemently against this as she had decided to do a review of the music of Patty Smyth.  Her and the Chairman of the School of Fine Arts, Foodwin P. Elegante went to Sumarongi Chancellor John to ask that a Board of Regents meeting be called to discuss the matter.  When they went in to Chancellor John's office he didn't know who the hell they were because of his worsening case of Alzheimer's. They then went to the real power at Sumarongi, Dean James and he agreed to call a meeting.

Meeting Attendees
Chancellor John, Dean James, Scholar in Residence:  Culpepper Pemplefelt, Scholar Emeritus:  "Ye Olde Farte", School of Fine Arts Chairman:  Dr. Foodwin P. Elegante, Drama Department Head:  Pantz A. Deleon, Computer Science Department Head:  Dr. Cobol D. Clodpate,  Science Department Head:  Dr. Mortimer A. Magpie,  School of Business Chairman:  Paul Bunion, The Alumni Honorarium:  Baroness Von Vegalilly of Luxembourg and Chief of Security: Zell U. Light.

Scholar Emeritus:  "Ye Olde Farte".  Despite his title, "Ye Olde Farte"  wields a great amount of power at Sumarongi.  The honor of being called "Ye Olde Farte"  is passed down to each Scholar Emeritus.  No one really knows what his real name is.  Rumor has it, it is John but no one would dare call him John or be prepared to endure his incredible wrath.  His most important contribution to academia is "The Three T's" Theory.  Time, Taco and Tabasco.  His lifelong research has been the assertion that there is no such thing as time.  He has written many papers and done many tests to prove his theory that time does not exist. Time is just something some stupid idiot developed.  The other T's are Tabasco and Taco.  He also has done a life's worth of research on his assertion that Tabasco sauce is the elixir of life.  Once again he has written many papers that prove his theory on why Tabasco sauce is essential to human existence.  The last T is Taco.  He feels that the singer Taco is the most underrated genius in music history and has been a champion to put Taco in his proper place amount the greats of music such as Mozart, Bach, Sinatra, Pavarotti, Stravinsky.

                                      School of Fine Arts Chairman:  Dr. Foodwin P. Elegante

                                                Drama Department Head:  Pantz A. DeLeon

Dr. Elegante and Pantz A. DeLeon are the true power couple at Sumarongi.  They are married and rule all things in the Fine Arts with an iron fist.  Dr. Elegante is a world renowned expert on the films of internationally famous director, Federico Fabrizi.  He is always immaculately dressed and casual attire to him is a three piece suit.  Pantz A. DeLeon is known for the attractive pants suits she wears around campus.  She reportedly was married to Foodwin in a white pants suit.  Rumor also has it they do not sleep in the same bed and neither has ever seen each other naked.  They believe their children were conceived by test tube.  It is said no one has ever seen Pantz A. DeLeon's legs ever.

                                Computer Science Department Head: Dr. Cobol D. Clodpate

                                                        Chief of Security:  Zell U. Light

The meeting started quite rambunctiously with heated disputes between "Ye Olde Farte" and Foodwin P. Elegante.  Foodwin said that no one was going to force their will on the School of Fine Arts.  At one point Security Chief Zell U. Light had to step in and separate the two or fists were going to fly.  Culpepper Pemplefelt and Dean James then came up with a brilliant plan and compromise which would satisfy both parties.  They decided the fall musical would be a musical review of famous one named singers,  Each attendee would submit one nominee and a special blue ribbon committee would choose six of the singers for the final musical.  Then each person could submit several songs by each artist and the committee would select two numbers for each of the artists for the musical.  The final vote was 11-0 in favor of the plan and disaster was averted.

The following were the artists nominated by each attendee:

Chancellor John:  He didn't nominate anyone because he had no idea what they were talking about.
Dean James:  Dion
Culpepper Pemplefelt:  Morrissey, and he picked 2 songs he felt were culturally significant: "Tony The Pony" and "Dagenham Dave".
"Ye Olde Farte":  Taco
Dr. Foodwin P. Elegante:  Fabian
Pantz A. DeLeon:  Martika
Dr, Cobol D. Clodpate:  Lulu
Paul Bunion:  Cher
Dr. Mortimer A. Magpie:  Pink
Baroness Von Vegalilly:  Basia
Zell U. Light:  Beyonce

London

                                                                              London

It seems Culpepper Pemplefelt has decided to stay in London for a few days.  He was very excited to visit Piccadilly Circus.  He was very impressed with the architecture and the hustle and bustle of the crowd.  Culpepper was puzzled why there were no elephants, tigers, jugglers, clowns, high wire acts, after all isn't that what a circus is?  After strolling around Piccadilly Circus, Culpepper began to look for The Piccadilly Palare.  He looked for several hours and became very upset.  Piccadilly Palare was one of his favorite Morrissey songs.  He asked several people and they were unable to help.  The people he asked, knew of Morrissey but never heard of The Piccadilly Palare.  Culpepper thought that possibly The Piccadilly Palare was closed or did not exist.  He was very disappointed that Morrissey would sing about a place that didn't exist and thought smugly to himself that Morrissey could never match his intellectual level.

                                                                  Piccadilly Circus

                                                                 Piccadilly Palare

After his fruitless search for The Piccadilly Palare, Culpepper decided he wanted to visit the shrine to Mr. Bean and light a candle.  Mr. Bean is one of Culpepper's favorite television characters.  He feels that his use of non verbal communication was revolutionary.  Culpepper was extremely disappointed when the character was discontinued.  He is considering writing a play about the bouts of depression he and others suffered when he realized there would be no more Mr. Bean episodes.

Culpepper knew he had to find the subway to take him to the Mr Bean shrine.  When he asked several Londoner's, they directed him to the Subway restaurant.  In exasperation he told them, he didn't want to eat, he needed to get to The Mr. Bean Shrine.  He was directed to use The Tube.  Culpepper was horrified.  People in London traveled underground in a tube like they have at the drive-up window at the bank?  What a strange method of travel, he thought, but he must investigate.  He found the closest Tube entrance, went down the steps and sighed.  It was just like a regular subway in New York or Boston.  Culpepper thought to himself, this is why he came up with the phrase "America and Great Britain are two nations divided by a common language".

As he was making his way through the station he noticed two men busking and went over to have a look.  They were singing a U2 song called "Even Better Than The Real Thing".  Culpepper had always liked U2, so he listened and politely clapped when they finished.  In the pause between songs, Culpepper went over to the men and said they sounded pretty good but had a long way to go before they could sound like U2,  The men introduced themselves to Culpepper.  The guitarist's name was David Evans and the vocalist's was Paul Hewson.  Culpepper commented to the guitarist that his guitar was slightly out of tune and the singer was a little bit flat on the higher notes.  They both nodded and said they would work on it.  Culpepper was also very disgusted as the guitar player was playing an acoustic guitar.  Culpepper emphatically said that if you play an acoustic guitar you must be a protest singer.  Mr. Evans cordially smiled and said, you can play any type of music on an acoustic guitar.  Culpepper shrugged his shoulders and moved on to catch the next train.  He again was questioning his faith in Morrissey, who sang "I thought that if you had an acoustic guitar it meant that you were a protest singer".  Culpepper had always believed this to be the case and was not smiling and quite serious on the tube ride to The Mr. Bean Shrine.  Maybe this Morrissey fellow wasn't all that.  Then Culpepper thought, the fact was, there are very few that can meet his scholarly prowess.

                 David Evans and Paul Hewson, not near as good as U2, per Culpepper Pemplefelt

Culpepper's mood changed as he made it to The Mr. Bean Shrine.  He was quite jovial walking around looking at all the photo's of his favorite TV character.  He self righteously thought to himself, none of these other people understand the effect Mr. Bean has had on modern culture, and one day in the future Mr. Bean will be compared somewhere between Macbeth and King Lear.

After The Fox

I finally found him!!  After years of searching, the enigmatic Culpepper Pemplefelt has reappeared alive and well in England of all places.  He had previously spent 6 months alone on a deserted Caribbean island researching his latest thesis "No Man is an Island".  Apparently he decided to leave the island because he was dissatisfied with room service, so at this time his thesis research has been put on hold.

                                                                 "Old Prune Face"

Culpepper decided to go to The UK for several reasons.  He had an audience with the British actress Prunella Scales.  He is developing a college course on the social significance and influence of movies with "Old Prune Face" in them.  Culpepper is scholar in residence at Sumarongi College.

                                                  The enigmatic Culpepper Pemplefelt

Culpepper was also in England to visit the grave of his favorite politician, The Right Honourable Sir Alec Douglas-Home.  When Sir Alec passed away on October 9, 1995, Culpepper was devastated.  He was in mourning for 10 years, in which time he never left his apartment at Sumarongi College.  This is where he came up with his theory "No Man is an Island".  Culpepper Pemplefelt has truly suffered for his art and intelligence.

                                                            Sir Alec Douglas-Home

Culpepper has many items on his plate at this time.  He had other business in in jolly old England.
He is in the process of writing a biography of the British playwright Joe Orton.  As part of his research, he felt it was important to interview Edna Welthorpe.  Culpepper is apparently fascinated by the alter egos of Joe Orton and how he developed them.  Edna would not meet Culpepper face to face, but she did agree to meet in the confessional of a Catholic Church.  Culpepper agreed to the meeting even though he has many issues with the Catholic Church, especially his feeling that all Priests are perverted winos because they drink wine as part of the mass.

                                                                     Joe Orton

Culpepper has also been very troubled by the eternal question:  Is it better to burn out than fade away?  He has been suffering recent bouts of insomnia as he considers the ramifications of the question, how it applies to him, humanity and his favorite singer, Morrissey.  He is only able to sleep after drinking large quantities of gin.  His research into the meaning of this series of words: Gunter, glieben, glauchen, globen has been very trying as he cannot seem to decipher the secret code behind them.  This has been haunting him, taunting him, giving him severe ulcers and Barrett's esophagus.  This is the price Culpepper pays for carrying the burdens of the world on his back.  He will be returning to Sumarongi College to his Scholar in residence position, but first he will stop at the Battleship Oklahoma memorial.  He doesn't necessarily grieve for the lost sailors but he does pine that he never was able to get a haircut in the ship's barber shop.

                                                 Is it better to burn out, than fade away?

                                                      Battleship Oklahoma Barbershop

Project For The New Millennium

I had a dream last night, I was in a college class and I had to write an essay.  My essay was titled "Project For The New Millennium".   The essence of my project is to end marriage as we know it.  I woke up and immediately wrote this down and fell back to sleep.  I do think marriage as we know it has become antiquated.  It is basically a contract between 2 consenting adults.  The religious aspects are another matter.  It seems in today's world more couples are just living together.  Legally this could be good or bad depending on the situations of each of the partners.

I am delighted that gay people are allowed to marry.  Why shouldn't two people who love each other be allowed to be married.   It again comes down to what is right.  Again, contractually and legally it makes sense for gay couples.  Men and women can marry, men and men, women and women, are we going down a slippery slope?  Could a man potentially marry a dog?  Ha, ha, just kidding, that one was for you Rick Sanitarium, you creepo Republican.  Seriously though, if I support gay marriage, how does that impact my project to end marriage?

As society gradually evolves, should marriage go the route of the passenger pigeon?  I say yes.  If a couple wants to be together they can just go to the local government agency and sign a legal contract.  Why go through the formality of a costly wedding?  Chances are in 5 years the couple will be divorced.  There's a good probability that one of the spouses are cheating.  What does this say about marriage?  In many cases its a sham!!  Its an ancient tradition who's time should be done.  As more and more people turn away from religion, society's mores are changing.  People living together is certainly not frowned upon, like it used to be.

                                                                     D-I-V-O-R-C-E

Of course, my crusade to end marriage is just another quixotic adventure.  In fact, it's not real at all, it was just a dream I had last night.  I really don't care about marriage at all, as I will never marry.

                                              Morrissey - Will Never Marry (Nor will I)

One other small thought I had (most of my thoughts are small, but I still walk tall).  What will happen in the future when technology will have robots that are basically just like humans?  Will humans be permitted to marry robots?  It could be very interesting.

                                                           Love In The Year 3000

In other exciting news, our Moz has returned to the USA for a tour. Starting in New Orleans and going through Atlanta and Durham, so far.  He will be in Washington, DC tonight.  All the reviews and videos have been wonderful.  Mozza sounds better than ever.  He looks healthy and of course I wish him and the band all the best throughout the tour.  Unfortunately, Our Moz is not coming to Pittsburgh so I shall be unable to attend.  Because of circumstances beyond my control, I am unable to travel.  I do wish that all of the attendees have a marvelous experience because they are seeing a true legend.

             
                                                  Our Moz in The City of New Orleans

   
                        More than Georgia is on Mozza's mind, as he scoops up a bug in Atlanta

                                       Nothing could be finer than for Moz to be in Carolina    

The Author of the "Project For The New Millennium"

                                                          They call him "Mr. Nobody"

The last living mortal on earth.  Humanity has conquered mortality through the endless renewal of cells but not for Mr. Nobody.  An enigma, an anachronism, at some point no trace will exist that he ever existed.