Yesterday we finally buried my Mother. She died on Wednesday November Ninth. The burial took more than two weeks because she is interred at a Military cemetery as my Dad is a veteran. It took all that time because of bureaucracy and paperwork.
The shock of her death has somewhat worn off but the hole in my heart and soul still aches at her loss. We just had a small family ceremony. Each of us could say something if we chose. I would rather have had that than some Priest who didn't know her preach some meaningless platitudes. I read a poem called "A Dirge" by Percy Bysshe Shelley.
Rough wind, that moanest loud
Grief too sad for song;
Wild wind, when sullen cloud
Knells all the night long;
Sad storm whose tears are vain
Bare woods, whose branches strain,
Deep caves and dreary main, --
Wail, for the world's wrong!
My Mom was cremated, so I had no idea what to expect for her remains. I was totally surprised when I saw this little box. It was like, that's not my Mother. It's just some box full of ashes. The spirit and soul that was my Mother left as I was holding her hand on November ninth when she died. I am still haunted and troubled by that moment. The suffering my Mom had to go through because of the idiots at that Hospital. And I'm mad at God, who let one of his dearest servants go through that hell in her hour of death. If anyone on this earth's death should have been peaceful, it should have been my lovely Mother, who wouldn't hurt a fly. Life surely is a pigsty.
I put a bouquet of flowers on her grave, said my goodbyes and it was over. At this point, seeing my family so stricken with grief upset me almost as much as losing Mom. On my drive home, I kept thinking about how small her box of ashes was. You live a full life and it all comes down to this small box.
Take a deep breath and swallow
Your sorrow
Tomorrow
No comments:
Post a Comment